I DECIDE - Rekha Sharing

I DECIDE......is something that I DO on a moment-to-moment basis, but had never given it a thought until recently, says Rekha, a mother.

How do I actually take my Decisions? What makes me decide on what to do and what not to do? How do I decide when to do what and how much? What are the criteria I take into consideration when I make decisions? For how long have I been taking these steps to make my decisions? Looking back at my own life, in my childhood years there were a few decisions I took and a few of them were by the elders in my life.

I don't know about the choices that adults made for me, but if I question those choices that I made...... Those choices to decide to do a particular action, take up a particular subject to study, make friends with a certain person, maintain that friendship for life...... Lots more decisions in my teenage and adult life.....All these decisions have come from my needs, likes, dislikes, wishes, wants, dreams, feelings, fears........ When it came to my children, there were few decisions that I took on their behalf, few of them did it for themselves.

The ones I took on their behalf were actually to make my life easy, to feel a certain kind of certainty, to keep myself same looking at this list..it seems that the decisions that I take for them aren't actually for them....it's more for myself. Now I am questioning myself...Am I deciding for them or myself?